Day 2

Day 2-
Flagstaff, Az ---->Page, Az---> Grand Canyon South Rim ---> Flagstaff, Az

4:05 am:
Wake up everyone!!!!! I roll over to take the pillow off of Steph's face... (she's not a morning person) and then start the normal morning routine: makeup, clothes, straighten hair. I mean, who doesn't straighten their hair at 4am to go on a river rafting excursion in the Grand Canyon?

4:30 am:
Everyone's waiting in the car, but Steph and I are still primping. Yawn. Did I mention it's crazy shirt day? My cousin wears a God shirt, Steph's says "I <3 the Southwest," and I'm rockin' the rainbow "Legalize Gay" tank. Mom went for a black top-- boo.

4:35am:
We begin the 2 1/2 hour drive to Page, Az to meet our tour guides and start this epic adventure. How did I end up in the front seat with the driving nazi? boooo again


5:45am:
Or 6:45 am as the Navajo like to call it. Apparently we ended up in a time warp/vortex/twilight zone where the Navajo decide to change their clocks to confuse tourists. One point for the Navajo! We thought we were going to be late for the raft, but luckily google was a saviour.

7:00am:
We have arrived in Page, Az! How do they have a Wal Mart Super Center? The world may never know! We see people waiting for our bus, no guys between the ages of 18-25. Trust me, we asked. Steph and I walked back to the car to get food and we met a bum who wanted money, food, and a ride to Salt Lake City. He wasn't between the ages of 18-25 either.

7:30am:
We are traveling under the Earth's surface in a tunnel that goes to the dam. I wish the bus driver would stop talking and focus on the road... Steph asks Scott "Have you ever been under the Earth's surface, in a time vortex, eating jicama, with 2 girls from California, singing 'California Gurls'?" My poor cousin is sheltered.



7:40am:
Ummm apparently we have to wear hard hats when we get to the loading dock.. it's under the bridge at the dam and I don't want a falling penny or depressed person to ruin my hair do. Fantastic.




8:00am:
We are situated in a pontoon boat with a bunch of boring people. It's beautiful out, we're in the Colorado River in Glen Canyon by the dam. Too many damn dam jokes to remember. The water is 46* and its about 80* out. BEAUTIFUL! The view is surreal, and our boat guide is clearly on something. He asks if we have any questions, Steph: "WHAT TIME IS ITTTTTTT?" This should be interesting...


9:00am:
Tour guide has told us all about the Wal Mart Super Center, his second job as a "medicine man" (he told us where to get the best peyote) and basically every aspect of his life until now. Prime example of why people should go to college- he's used the word "tooken" about 30 times so far.




10:30am:
We reach a little beach where we can get a close up look at some Native American rock paintings or carvings or something. We're dared to go in the freezing water, but I just straightened my hair, and Steph got her nails done. Bummer. Steph asks if there is cell service because she needs to check Perez, no one laughs hahahah.

12:15pm:
Back in Page after an hour bus drive. Off to Subway to watch some people neglect their children and order footlongs with extra sauce. I got a salad. muhaha

1:30pm:
We decide to go to the South Rim of the Grand Canyon to get a better view... 2 hour drive? Steph sits in the front this time so i don't have to navigate.

3:30pm:
THE AMISH FROM SIZZLER HAVE FOLLOWED US!!! Did they take a horse and buggy to the South Rim? Possibly. Stalkers!

4:30pm:
Steph calls my mom Howard because she keeps pulling off at every stop along the rim. It all looks the same to me! We find the place that Brit Brit filmed "I'm not a girl/not yet a woman" and we play "gay or european" with the weirdos who pass by. Everyone stares at my "Legalize Gay" shirt. I'm a spectacle.



5:15pm
My cousin has taken up beatboxing. We don't know how to handle this. What exactly do they DO in Oklahoma??

Head back toward Flagstaff, Az. Arrive around 7:00pm. Apparently my cousin took pictures of me sleeping in the car. Freakin' paparazzi. Now time to shower and decide on dinner...

9:00pm:
OLIVE GARDEN. Steph asks for the nutritional information and we laugh at people who ordered hundreds of grams of fat wrapped in noodles and cheese. We eat salad. We're from California.


10:00pm:
After a short trip to Walgreens for Tums we get back to the hotel room to see everyone asleep. Party poopers. Looks like this blog will have to be written in the bathroom!

Keepin' it classy,

Francine